Pai Mei & Hanzo
3 Rating
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🙂 = Cool chalk-drawn, mashup, wall mural of a DC-Mexico-Japan city skyline. Incredibly efficient assembly line helps long queues move at break-neck speed. Don’t want to risk feeding your mini-me(s) raw fish? Fear not! Buredo offers shrimp tempura, tofu, veggie, and slow cooked pork shoulder options for weary mamas and papas. They also have snacks available: rice chips, wasabi peas, chocolate chip cookies with crisp rice, and black sesame sables with lemon.

🙁 = No high chairs, changing table, or kids menu. Seating is crazy limited to just one large, communal table that can seat about 6-8 people. So don’t plan on dining in as landing a seat is a total crap shoot, especially, if there’s more than one of you. The space itself is also as small as a newborn diaper so plan on busting out the umbrella stroller for easier navigation. Weekday lunchtime rush is especially busy with lines out the door although, as I mentioned before, moves with the quickness. The size of the rolls are far too big for small mouths to handle but that can easily be remedied by cutting  them into normal, sushi-sized bites.

Hours: Mon-Fri 11AM – 8PM / Sat 11AM – 6PM / Sun Closed

Notes: 5 gummy bears for the food alone. The food is the star here. And the saving grace for what would have, ultimately, been a one gummy rating. Flavor and freshness reign supreme. What brings the score down are the lack of kid amenities, small space, lack of seating, busy atmosphere, and size of the sushi burrito compared to the size of a child’s mouth. But here’s a cool little tidbit…go to the first page of photos on Yelp to see our little homie FoodbabyNY!

Man! What a week! My three-year-old derriere just became an uncle! But if you ask me, I’m too young for that “#2”. I mean, for crying out loud, I’m still not old enough to substitute “derriere” and “#2” with what I really want to say without getting into deep “#2”!  But what’s done is done. I love my new niece and I needed to celebrate, gosh darnit!

Burgers were on the brain until those hopes were immediately dashed in favor of mom’s “hanger” craving for Buredo, the new sushi burrito joint that opened earlier this summer. Those in the know KNOW that not even my movie star face or the sweetest utterances of “I love you” can soothe my “hangry” ma. She becomes someone else entirely. And for those that don’t know, get caught up to speed here.

Fear overcame me as I helplessly surrendered to the woman I usually recognize as mother. Buredo it is mommy dearest. I love you so much. Please don’t hurt me.

Waiting in line in front of some cool wall art

See my face? That’s the look of fear. Mother, I bow to your “hangry” cravings.

So after some pumpkin decorating and other Halloween festivities at Canal Park we headed over to McPherson Square to grab some “sushitos”? “burishis”? Whatever man. I just wanted my mama back.

Burredo assembly line

Sushi burrito ninjas working with the quickness to help bring my mama back

And no, you don’t need to clean your ears. You heard me right the first time. Burrito sushi. Sushi the size of burritos. It’s a thing. And it’s a thing of beauty. Move over Chipotle! There’s a new kid in town. But I was in no mood to try something new. At the same time, I dared not speak a word until all was well with mom. Luckily for me, the space was small, all the seats at the lone, communal table were taken, and it was too cold for my folks to enjoy their nori wrapped Nemo at Franklin Square. So dad asked me if I wanted to eat at the Five Guys across the street while they enjoyed their sushi burrito mashups there. I shed a solitary tear and in a strained, muted whisper was able to muster a “Yes dad. thank you!”

Delicious salmon and tuna sushi burritos

Kill Bill characters in sushi form. The Pai Me (salmon) and Hanzo (tuna)

So I got my burger. But mom’s Pai Mei (salmon, asparagus, pea shoot leaves, pickled red onion, daikon, katsuo mirin crunch, toasted sesame mayo) and dad’s Hanzo (yellowfin tuna, avocado, cucumber, pickled fennel, arugula, tempura crunch, lemon aioli) were the stars of this show. Literally. Think Kill Bill. Still don’t know what I’m talking about? Google it here. One bite and mom’s “hanger demons” were vanquished with the quickness. Her furrowed brows relaxed. Her dilated pupils contracted. Thank you fish for being so clean and silky. Thank you vegetables for being so fresh and crisp. Thank you sushi rice for being a thin enough layer to let the fish and veggies shine. And thank you nori for being a salty superfood. I missed my mother so. And your joint, taste-bud-stimulating efforts reunited us. They also made my folks serious fans of yours. So upon our eventual return, I’ll be sure to give you a shot and try your proclaimed deliciousness for myself. I owe you, at least, that.

825 14th St. NW
Washington, DC 20005

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